Re-framing Success

Many people think there is a limited amount of success, happiness, money, love, etc. to go around. For instance, if Dr. Becky is successful in her practice, then Dr. James has lost some degree of his potential success to Dr. Becky. However, if Dr. James and Dr. Becky look at the number of doctors practicing in their area and compare that to the population of the city, they will see there are far more patients than either of them can see. If there are 15 doctors practicing in a city with a population of 21,000 and each of the 15 doctors have access to 1,400 patients, which is more than enough to build a thriving practice.

Instead of viewing the success of others as an indication of your impending failure, try the perspective that there is enough in the world for you and everyone else. I know it’s sometimes hard to accept that idea when you don’t have a clear view of just how vast things really are. If you’re single and go out on the town and see happy, loving couples all around you, it’s easy to assume all the great people have been taken and that means you’re doomed to live a life of solitude. If you were to take a look at a local singles website, however, you might be very surprised at how many wonderful singles are in your own backyard.

Believe it or not, someone else’s success in a particular area has no effect on your potential for success, other than to provide encouragement that it can be done. Success is something you can create rather than borrow. Instead of taking someone else’s clients or relationship, you can build your own from a completely different source but the key is in understanding this principle. What you see in front of you isn’t all there is, just like in the examples above.

In the future, try this. Instead of becoming depressed or feeling defeated when you notice someone else that has what you want, smile and say to yourself, “That’s for me! I’m going to have that, too! If they can do it, I can do it.” If you say this or something similar to it with intent behind your words, you will notice a shift in your attitude and you’ll find yourself feeling much more uplifted and optimistic and it is from this state of being you can be creative and find new avenues to your success.